You worried for a reason, so accept it. At one time in your life you believed it served you. It could be from early childhood when part of the biological fight, flight or freeze mechanism got activated because the natural cycle was not completed. This can create some level of PTSD. PTSD can create anxiety and worry. A sense of always needing to be on the alert, vigilant, bracing for the next crisis. So have compassion for that part of you that was doing the best it could.
You may have been operating under the misconception that being on guard served you. Your subconscious mind's #1 job is to keep you safe. You didn’t see how that anxiety rather than strengthening you, threw you off. It's hard to have balance when that anxious and worrying (even resentful!) thoughts take hold.
I believe there is no movement forward without acceptance. For me, acceptance is a surrender. I can’t get caught up in the punishing would of, could of, should of’s that my mind can conjure. This is who I am, I did the best I could. I love and value myself just the way I am.
This is where I would suggest the beautiful and ancient Hawaiian practice of forgiveness, Ho’oponopono. In a nutshell, changing your self-talk from frightening yourself to reassuring yourself.
I love you
I’m sorry
You didn't do anything wrong.
Thank you
Love & Blessings,
Pamela
For more on Ho’oponopono: http://www.ancienthuna.com/ho-oponopono.htm